Day 3 – How did this happen?


To paraphrase Bob and Doug McKenzie:  “And welcome to Day 3.”

So far, so good.  Same breakfast as yesterday, and last night, we had the same dinner as the night before.  Gotta love leftovers.  The kid is doing a great job… he had broccoli and half a PB&J in his lunch yesterday.  And last night, he ate half of the lasagne he was served as well as the entire salad.  Of all the carbs he loves, he’s not a fan of pasta.  Strange, that.

So I’ve been pondering the “how did I get here” question.  I’ve seen pictures of myself as a child, and I was no bigger than most kids.  I grew up in Massachusetts on an Air Force base.  There were a number of kids on our block in base housing, and most of them were my friends.  We played outside a LOT, climbing trees, playing with our Barbies and GI Joes, playing in the sandbox (when there wasn’t cat poo in it), playing tag and freeze tag.  I was quite active.  But I loved to eat.

My mom is an excellent cook.  She made homemade noodles, cobblers, and bread.  We always had dessert.  We always sampled what was cooking, tasting from the pot or bowl.  “Finish your dinner” was a standard phrase.  I can’t remember if they pulled out the “kids are starving in <3rd world nation>” or not, but it was close.  And while we were putting away leftovers, we always had those last few bites.  She also made plenty of things I didn’t like, such as liver or stuffed peppers (I don’t care what anyone says… scoop out the stuffing and it tastes like peppers!).  When she made things I didn’t like or when we had a babysitter, I’d get my favorite:  Kraft macaroni and cheese.  Yum!

When I was 10, we moved to California.  Ah, land of sunshine and fruit!  Peaches fresh off the tree!  Grapes nearly year-round!  I loved fruit… and I ate a LOT of it.  I’d have 4 peaches in a sitting… yum!  But that’s just fruit, I hear you saying.  Here is an interesting site regarding sugar in fruits: Sugar Stacks.  There is a lot of sugar in fruits.  Granted, it’s a more natural sugar than candy and there are many good things in fruits as well, but at the volume I consumed fruit and the other snacks my mom had on hand, I started to gain weight.

I was lonely.  We had moved all the way across the country.  There was no email or iPhone or internet in 1973 so I was effectively cut off from anything or anyone I had known.  I was teased at school for being a little chunky when we moved to California and it just got worse.  I made a few friends but I always felt like I was a little on the outside.  Food was my constant friend.  It didn’t tease me or say it didn’t want to go with me.  Being tested as “gifted” at age 11 didn’t help matters much either. 

Kids can be cruel.  Food is always friendly.

Exercise makes me uncomfortable.  Always has, always will.  So even as a preteen, I avoided exercise when I could.  I loved riding my bike, though I didn’t really see that as “exercise.”  It was a means of freedom.  Don’t get me wrong, I had a great home life.  I just wanted to do what I wanted to do.  Maybe it’s because I was an only child.  Maybe it’s because it was the 70s.  Or maybe it was just me wanting to spread my wings.

Dad was in the Air Force and worked quite a bit.  Mom was (and still is) a church musician and choir director, and when I was in my early teens, she was also going to school at night.  Dad joined her at night classes for awhile, leaving me alone at home.  I’d make a pot of spaghetti (at least 2 servings worth), put parmesan on it, and I’d eat that while watching TV.  And this was AFTER dinner.  I think back to that and cringe.  I was obsessed with food, with feeling satisfied, with carbs.

Carbs, carbs, carbs… I’ve rarely met a carb I didn’t instantly bond with.  Cupcakes, cookies, chips, crackers… yum.  Just saltines and ice tea, a favorite snack.  Cake, bread, doughnuts, pastries, pasta.  <sigh>  I could go on and on, but I’m sure you get the picture.  Oh, I love fruit, too… a diet of fruit and bread would be my idea of heaven.  The hell with proteins… gimme carbs!!

So I can see it goes WAY back.  I don’t remember much about my diet before the age of 10 or so.  Does that mean that food wasn’t my focus before then?  I know I ate cereal.  I told my mom when I was 3 that I didn’t need a mom because I could get my own breakfast.  Yeah, she wasn’t happy to hear that either. 

Okay, enough meandering down memory lane.  Not an entirely bad experience on the lane today, but there’s still more delving to do later.

Enjoy your day, dear reader… I’m nearly done with my breakfast and the MT plate is, indeed, empty.  C’mon people… DICTATE already!  🙂

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Day 2 – Steady as we go…


So here we are in Day 2. Day 1 ended on a fairly good note. I had 4 Lorna Doone shortbread cookies while playing last night. Better than 10, right?

As we forge ahead, I’ll try to tackle my stressors… those things that cause me to want to eat without hunger. I’ll also be looking at other times that I want food but I’m not stressed. I need to figure out WHY I eat and figure out a different, more positive thing to do instead. There will always be those times when it’s okay to give in A LITTLE… 2 cookies rather than 4 or 1 piece of Dove chocolate rather than a whole bag. You get the picture. I’m worried a little about “that time of the month.” I’m a chocolate fiend for about 3 days and it’s very hard to withstand the craving. We’ll see what happens.

So here I am with my breakfast, checking out the news before I get to work (the queue is empty again… only 3 jobs yesterday!). In a huge coffee mug, I put 2/3 cup low fat cottage cheese, 1 packet of equal, a few shakes of Dean and Deluca cinnamon powder, and 2 rather small handfuls of loose granola (not the chunky kind). I mix that up nicely, then put in over a cup of grapes. The grapes are from Costco and they are HUGE, so I just topped the mug off with grapes. This is my favorite breakfast, regardless what the rest of my diet is at any given time.

What is so interesting about this particular breakfast is that when I was growing up, my mom would eat pineapple with her cottage cheese, adding a little sweetener to the cottage cheese first. I would gag when I’d see it. I mean, cottage cheese is a savory food! What’s with the sweetener!?! GROSS! Of course, I’d let her know how gross it was because the switch that tell us not to say something… well, mine is broken. But when I got older and was searching for an easy breakfast that was comprised of more than toast, I remembered my mom’s sweetened cottage cheese thing. I still don’t care for pineapple with it, but I love it with peaches, nectarines, grapes, or berries. Yum! I don’t use any citrus fruits because they seem to curdle the cottage cheese for me and apples are right out. Bananas are iffy. For me, it’s the moisture in the fruits that help make the dish.

For dinner last night, Joe made a very tasty turkey lasagne that we’d gotten from Costco. Normally, we’d eat most of it for 1 meal, but we ate the serving size indicated, along with a salad, and it was satisfying. I didn’t feel uncomfortable at all, which is preferred but not always the end result. For dinner tonight, we will have leftovers and a salad.

After dinner, we played and watched TV. Joe and the Kid went to bed around 8:00 p.m. which left me to my own devices. THAT’S when the food situation gets dangerous for me. I had some peanuts by my computer but all that was left equalled roughly a small handful. No problem… nice little snack. A half-hour later, I hit the Lorna Doones. Perhaps because they were there, on the computer desk, just waiting for me… yeah, I need to NOT have food available.

As for liquids, I have 2 travel cups of coffee in the morning (nursing them all morning while I work) then at lunch, I start my iced tea period. I drink iced tea the rest of the afternoon and evening from a large insulated straw cup. I love that thing because there is no moisture to drizzle down the outside and get all over everything. I use 1 Equal in the tea.

I work upstairs in a cubicle in an office room (my WoW machine is downstairs… neither the twain shall meet!). Here at my desk, I have a jar of Emerald Dry Roasted Peanuts (YUM!) and a half-dozen Nature Valley Fruit and Nut granola bars in the drawer. In a container on the desk, I have Costco dried fruit and nut mix. If I can limit myself to a handful (modest) once a day, I should be good.

Okay… enough of this for now. There is actually work in my queue. For our non-MT visitors, I’ll tackle “What is an MT and what do you do” at some point this week. Until then, just know that I work at home and I type for a living. It’s a pretty sweet and interesting gig, even if it’s not very profitable.

Have a great day!

The Plan and The Goals


Okay, so I’m going to do this thing and if I’m going to have it out there for ALL to see, I’ve got to give it a real, true go.  So, here are “da rulz” of the new life.

THE PLAN
First, we are a family team.  If Joe, who does the cooking, doesn’t feel like it, the Kid and I will fill in and find something tasty and healthy for us to eat.  Even better is if Joe can make some things ahead for us to heat up so it’s as if he’s cooking while he’s relaxing.  It’s only going to work if we rely on each other.  The Kid won’t ask for fast food, I won’t buy chocolate, and Joe won’t give up.  These are our promises to each other.

Second, and most simply put, I’m going to eat better, eat less, and move more.  That means no fast-food breakfasts.  As easy and yummy as they are, I will have to ignore the bright lights of the tasty places on the way home from taking the Kid to school.  What I CAN do is fix a healthier version of my favorites here at home.  The PLAN would be a healthy breakfast, a snack after a few hours, a healthy lunch, a snack a few hours later, and a healthy dinner, followed by a snack before 7:30 (probably more fruit).  This way, the metabolism continues to work efficiently all day.  The most important part is to make sure the meals are reasonable and the snacks are small.

Third, we will not eat out if we’re too tired to cook.  The Hubby does the cooking but sometimes, he’s just to tired to do so.  We should probably just leave the phone number for Bellagio’s (our favorite pizza/grinder shop) off of the phone autodial.  So he will try to pre-make meals or premake a meatball or meatloaf mix and I can just make or bake it.  Salads are my specialty, so that’s not a problem.

Fourth, we will reward ourselves with tasty treats when we’ve accomplished certain milestones.  Our first will be a grinder from Bellagio’s if we can stick to our Plan for at least 1 week.  I know it’s not a good idea to reward with food, but we’ve tried other reward systems in the past and they just don’t work for us.  The deprivation of our favorite treats, with the promise of a reward of said treat in the future, is a tantalizing prospect for us.  We can always change our minds later, but for now, this will help us get through the first several months.

Fifth, and finally, we will add exercise.  In order to not become overwhelmed with changes, we will concentrate on the food changes first.  The Kid is getting PE 4 days a week so that will help with his progress initially.  Joe will add Bowflex and bike.  If he does that along with eating better, after a week he’ll be down 10 pounds.  I hate him for that but he’s a guy, what can I do.  As for me, in a few weeks, I’ll add some Richard Simmons 80s Sweatin’ DVD action.  For some reason, when HE says I can do it, I believe him!  If Jillian told me that, I’d have a very hard time believing her. 

THE GOALS
My goals are modest.

My short-term goal is the stick to the Plan.  It’s not just a day-to-day struggle.  I work at home, with the kitchen right downstairs, it can be  hard to not seek out something soothing when some ultrafast dictation renders my brain inactive.  The solution:  Fruits and veggies.  We will make sure to have fruit on hand for those snacks.  Luckily, I love most fruits.  Veggies are good, too… just have to work them in.  I’m open to suggestions!

My medium term goal is to get healthy… and off of insulin.  I’m diabetic and was on insulin in 1993, off when I had my surgery and lost weight from 1994 to 1999 when I had gestational diabetes then back on a few years after my son was born.  In addition, there are also the supplies for testing.  I’d like to eliminate the need for the supplies and the insulin, and to do that, I must lose weight.  If the Plan goes as planned, a loss of weight is the natural result.

Finally, my long-term goal is to see my son graduate from high school and college, and if he changes his mind, get married.  If I don’t change my ways, this will not happen.  Period.

SO… there you have it.  The Plan and the Goals.

On with the show!  Can I live with an MT plate?  We shall see.

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